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| Tomorrow is Sunday lunch at my grandparent's house in flower mound, I usually don't like these because my grandmother always finds ways to make all of my cousins and I guilty for things we are doing in life. She was excited that I was going to ACU but she made me feel guilty for the cost my parents had to pay, and my cousin Amber says that grandmother always makes her feel guilty for things that happen in her life too. She also gets on to me for not being responsible with things, and for not getting a job even though being in music school is my "job" now, and for not being in a relationship because all the good ones will be gone if I don't act soon. I really just get so tired of her. Her rules for living are so conservative and old fashioned. She wants all of her girls to be teachers, not even music teachers, just teachers like she was. She hates the fact that I am in music school (even though music school is way harder than normal school and there are more job openings because you can play and compose on the side). But she also doesn't understand that you can't just stroll into the UNT music department and get a scholarship. First, they eat you alive there and second they only give scholarships to people who have been there a while and that are really freaking amazing.
Sorry, I really needed to vent about all of this before I go to her house tomorrow because I know lunch will not go well, it never really does. I am really tempted to tell her tomorrow (when she asks me if there is a special someone in my life) that I am a lesbian and that's the whole reason I am going to TWU, just to see her face and maybe give her a heart attack. Then tell her that I was just being sarcastic because she never understands my sarcastic humor and she knows that. But I don't think I will because she might think I actually am a lesbian because I am not dating anyone at the moment. Because, clearly, if you aren't seeing someone something must be wrong with you. Tell it to Jesus. ok, I think I am finished with all of that. thanks for reading this far if you did! -Sarah | | |
| So tonight my little sister and I went to Blockbuster with my mom to rent a few movies and I saw matt waller from high school and I felt like a little kid, I don't know why but he looked like an older college kid and I felt like a 2 year old. I didn't talk to him, he didn't talk to me, it was actually very awkward for me. Feeling like mute kid, I don't like feeling that way. I kinda wish I would have atleast said hello to him, and even if he didn't remember me I would just seem like a nice person who likes to say hello to people. I always feel that way when I run into people from high school, I have seen Camden Z. in sam's a few times and we just look at each other and nod, it's very odd. I am no longer the really shy girl that I was in high school, I am a whole lot more confident but when I see people from high school I turn into that shy girl again and I don't like it. I actually would like to get to know a few of the people that I went to high school better but I feel that I have like "missed my chance" or something. I guess next time I see someone I will walk up and say hello and if they don't remember me I won't care, I think that's better than saying nothing at all. | | |
| Yes, you can know about this site, in fact I am going to be using just this site from now on just like I would the other one. It is just that I found out that my parents have read my site from time to time and that's not really cool with me so now I have a new one. And there are a few people out there on the net who have found me and I want to stay away from them. So, if I subscribed to you on this site subscribe to it, that is if you want too, but I would like it a lot so I hope you will. ok, thanks, bye! | | |
| I got a new site because I was feeling like my other one was becoming a bit too public and change is a good thing from time to time too. Sorry to be so middle schoolish by changing my site but I felt that because of reasons I needed too. Thanks! | | |
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